Dankdadd's game Reviews on Newgrounds

[Preparing for the SAT .1b]

So that was terrible. I mean I get it was a joke, but I feel like it could've been a much better joke. It doesn't help that the formatting and art is generally unpleasant to look at either.

[Malapa's Challenge]

"Just your friendly neighborhood bondage man."

This was fun, and kinda funny in a way. Definitely stood out amongst the other games of 2001. I have no idea why you decided to dress him up like that though. I have to admit, it does make for some fun jokes, but the rest of the game is kinda serious so why?

As the description says, there are plenty of great attributes to this game: startup min games, several enemy types, many unique skills, and a few stages with puzzles. None of these were particularly amazing, but the quantity of game play is astonishing for old flash. And especially incorporating them all together.

That aside, your one main flaw was repetition. The game feels as if you're doing the same thing over and over again. Now it gives a sense of progress with the gaining of abilities and leveling up, but you do mostly the same fight over and over. This could be fixed by having some more damage types, and stat moves. And more importantly lowering the spawn rate. Now you didn't have much to base this off of, so I'll give you a pass on being one of the first alongside Absalom and Castonia.

Now the story. I wasn't really sure about it at first, it seems a little unfinished. It didn't really make much sense, but it seemed to be going for a more god-like theme. I feel like much more in game explanation is needed. However I did like the line from Ares about why the gods were coming back, and how they were praised.

For the art, I feel like it was a little inconsistent at times, but in general I liked it. Much better than ms paint that's for certain.

Something that I especially enjoyed was the password system that only a few games of the time, put in enough time to necessitate and properly create one.

Overall, you put in a real effort, and I can appreciate that, but that only goes so far with all the clear flaws in your work. With a little balancing and polishing it'd be a whole lot better.

Good job Septimus.

[How da bitch stole Xmas!!]

I'll never be certain of why the anomaly of you getting decent scores on all your low effort shit posts stays true. I don't know how you were able to do nothing and get applauded for it, then continue to claim yourself as king of the portal. But you did, so good job.

I'm doing all the games, and each time I see yours I get a little ticked off. (maybe that's a clock pun.)

StrawberryClock responds:

Cool

[General, Stick Suicide]

"Okay men, let's go to these clearly dangerous areas that bring no significant gains to our side of the war."

So it's just a choose and die thing, mountain one could've been avoided if they just shot the cat. I liked the interface though.

[Fat Lady vs Doughnuts]

Simple time based gadget thingy, not amazing, but it works.

[Theory for bass made easy]

Although not an extremely poor tutorial, I'm not sure why you would publish it here for such a niche audience of people to appreciate it.

Now, I don't know if any of the info is wrong (probably not) but it definitely doesn't simplify anything, it more just throws terms at you. The hows and whys go almost unexplained, and there is no sound to compare anything to. I'm gonna be honest, after watching that I learned little to nothing.

I'd imagine this is probably a good brush up, but who'd be coming here for that?

PS: some of the flash animations took quite a few presses of the button and some skipped over the words instantly.

[Asteroids 2]

Love the minimalist style going on here, only two colors, nice and simple.

It's another meteors game, not many like it on the site quite yet, so it has an originality to it. I felt that it was balanced with how many shots you could do, and that holding down the space bar gave you auto fire. Not much else to it but simple fun.

[Booger Boy]

This is gross, why did you make me watch this?

It's just pong, with booger eating. I'd give it higher for the art and music, but honestly this just makes me feel sick.

[Funkey Town]

Nowhere near as good as your previous works, the music was non existent, and the comedy is completely different. This is the unfinished version though, so I'll give it the benefit of the doubt.

PS: For those curious the game ends at city hall door 2 it seems.